So I tore my meniscus. It’s not my mcl. Which is good, sort of. MCL’s can take forever to heal while my meniscus will have a short surgery and I’ll be better a few weeks later (Theoretically)
Anyways- I did 12.3. I wasn’t sure if I was going to because my knee is pretty screwed up, but my team needed me so I did it. And evidently I couldn’t hurt my knee anymore, it’s just about whether or not I can stand the pain. Which of course I can- That’s a given. So I did it and did okay. I couldn’t bounce on the box jumps so it was really slow and painful. But I did it and it will help my team and I’ll just ice the s**t out of my knee. I got 9 rounds plus 9 box jumps. I’m okay with it, obviously not happy, but I couldn’t jump very well and it is what it is. This entire season is teaching me how to deal with being disappointed in myself and getting over my ego. I’ll hopefully come out of it having learned a lot.
So I know I’ve talked about it before but I’m going to talk about it again…
I’m fucking sick of and disheartened by the fact that I have heard so much about cheating this year in the Open. (Multiple occasions and multiple sources) I think last year I had this idea that everyone was doing it for some benevolent reason or that it was crossfit and how could someone possibly cheat. I don’t really know why I thought this because I have one of the most pessimistic views of the human race that one could possible have. (I think everyone acts purely out of self-interest. Maybe this comes from studying politics for too long. I’m not sure) But this year, reality has set in and I’m disappointed by the human race again…even crossfitters. I’m quite astounded by the lack of standards upheld by individuals, gym owners, and athletes as a whole. And I’m disgusted by cheating, in their obvious forms…literally changing the amount of reps one got from low 60’s to high 70’s for example. In the end, it is what it is. If someone cheats their way to regionals they will get their s**t pushed in when things get heavy and real and you have a judge who is certified and knows what the hell they are doing. I will love every second of watching people who don’t deserve to be there, fail. I may be an asshole but I admit it, and I sure as hell wouldn’t put in a false score just to be higher on the leaderboard. Those people deserve to suffer and be embarrassed in front of a large audience.
Whatever- I have high expectations and high standards.
I have, for my entire life, held myself and everyone around me to incredibly high standards. It is a fault and often times causes problems with people who I love in one way or another. (Don’t worry, I hold myself to the same standards as I hold others…so maybe it is fair.)
Cherie Chan in her “Why CrossFit ruined my life” said it well, “Because of CrossFit, I believe all people are capable of amazing physical feats, when they don’t produce, I take it personally and have no tolerance for laziness.” I take everything personally. I know I shouldn’t, but I do. And when those around me don’t give 100%, I find it insulting. Even when it has nothing to do with me. I also expect everyone around me to do amazing things, all the time. So to sum it all up- I am easily insulted, I take everything personally, and I have extremely high expectations of everyone around me. Man, I suck.
On a positive note- Shaina decided to drive from Portland and visit this weekend. AND it was Chris’s birthday. So even though I couldn’t walk for the majority of the weekend, I loved seeing Shaina and celebrating the weekend with Chris. I bought him a gluten free carrot cake. It’s almost gone and I don’t even like cake. But its pretty delicious.